Feed your flame

Energy compounds, in both directions

Lately, I’ve been getting so much energy from being around a few people. The kind of people who make work feel lighter and my thinking feel sharper. Every conversation seems to add something: focus, clarity and conviction.

Then I came across a line in a song that’s been looping in my head (and on my Spotify).

“The prerequisite for spending time with any person is that they flourish and inspire you. They feed your flame. Look around. Look at the people around you. Are those people feeding your flame, or dousing your fire?“

We’re not dissecting relationships when we ask that. We’re recognizing alignment. The people who feed my flame remind me of who I am when I am at my best. They bring me back to my center.

I’ve also seen what happens when the flame dims. When you’re surrounded by people who take more than they give, this drift often happens quietly. You’re a little less sharp, a little less driven. The people around you probably haven’t even noticed, but you’re off your regular game. Hell, you might not even have noticed how your tone, your habits, or even your ambitions have started to fade. That’s how compounding works, both for better and for worse.

So maybe it’s worth asking more often: who around me is helping me become the person I want to be? The answer isn’t in intensity, it’s in consistency. The kind of alignment that steadies you when no one’s watching.

But then the thought that stayed longer with me was the inverse: am I feeding other people’s flames? Maybe that’s the real question. Not how much energy we draw from others, but how much we leave behind.